What I’ve learnt

That anger stems from fear, and hate is a product of hurt. Above all, it is because we love.

Hunter Valley vineyard


Stories don’t change but maybe we go back to them because we do.

Who ever decided now is the time

to be an adult

to live it up trying

to keep your feet on the ground

without being held down.

Whoever decided now is the time

to speak up

without speaking out

because one side is all

I can give I hope

that is enough for now.

Stories don’t change but maybe we go back to them because we do. Whoever decided for this story to be part of mine,

thank you.

No longer

I still can’t watch anything with a grandparent in it. Any familial scenes of a grandparent’s love or passing.

I still can’t read anything about a grandparent.

When will I be able to again, without falling apart? I can no longer watch even happy family scenes without the now-familiar ache in my chest.

I’m such a wreck after I do, and stifling sobs have become something I’m getting better at.

“Take care”

“Take care.”

A smile, a hug. An air kiss emoji.

There is something about leaving people behind – those that have showed you incredible kindness you don’t deserve – that keeps you from heading to where you’re meant supposed to be.

Your vote of confidence means more to me than you will ever know; it helps, when I have none. I don’t tell people I have faith in them unless I mean it.

This unspoken parting, this uncertainty of ever crossing paths again.

a dispersed seed.

(I hope) you will recognise me?

When If we do meet again?

All Over

Honestly speaking 

I can live with the lies.

Honestly speaking 

It gets better easier.

You’re better at it now

And you(re)new

Skin it in fool –

Not one of the few.

Just spill your hea(r)t 

All Over

Our cold shoulders

Don’t wait till you’re sober.


When it is all you can be defiant in,

claiming the world at your feet,

inadequacy removed from the abundance of potential –
Life demands; an ineludible jolt.

The easiest excuse. The biggest leap.

And my youth is but a cheap handicap.

A vestige of the future.


because the past cannot be contained

we carry them loud in our heads.

It bleeds and colours,

A slow ache spreads

painful recollections never mentioned

steal your breath, and –

This whirlwind you could not suppress breakneck maelstrom you will not repress.
Once forgotten, 

Not lost.